Let the Wound Bleed
by me-jane
Summary: Cid has spent his years blocking his grief at the loss of his world, making him a real jerk to say the least. Then his friends take him to listen to a girl singing in a pub...


Okay, I uploaded this earlier but I uploaded the wrong document and the text was messed up. The spaces and italics were all jumbled around. It was really hard to read. Hopefully this will fix that problem. I hope it reads better now. :P Sorry 'bout that.    

It was no mystery why Traverse Town was packed with so many diverse types of people. With so many unique worlds disappearing, their distinct inhabitants searched for a new home. It was common to see new faces among the population every day. Despite the differences in cultures, the people of Traverse Town shared one common trait: intense grief. A deep, painful sorrow burrowed in their hearts with the memory of their home, their perfect life, and the sudden destruction of all that they cherished.

            Nobody in Traverse ever discussed their past. It was common knowledge that a question as simple as "Where did you come from?" could unleash the most powerful feeling of loss and sadness. Instead, the theme of the town was a feeling of moving on. A new stage was set and they were the directors of creating a new life. It sounded exciting to the ear, but the heart cried in anguish. Letting go was not something Traverse Town was prepared to do.

            Everybody moped around. It was almost pitiful, the way Cid saw it. Out of the many ways to deal with the tragedy of their past, Cid had chosen a course of harsh cynicism. To suffocate the pain in his heart, he had become cold and distanced himself from everything he learned in his old life. He often criticized the rest of the crowd with their constant grievances, ridiculing them for their weakness. "The past is gone. This is your life now and the only choice you have is to make the best of it for fuck's sake!" he was often heard to exclaim. And everyone knew he was right, but to hear it from him made the words unbearable. Nobody wanted to become as emotionless, or, they said ever so cautiously, as heartless as he had become. Cid showed no empathy, for how could he? He erased his past from his memory. To him, nothing ever happened. He lived his life in Traverse as if he had been dropped out of the sky and landed right in the First District, destined to make his living there and nothing more.

            Leon frequently backstabbed Cid for his harshness to the lost citizens, but Aerith always hushed him. She was but a girl of thirteen when their world disappeared, and yet somehow she understood Cid's reaction to it all more than anyone.

            "It hurts him. He just ignores it. Give him time, he can't hold that feeling of despair forever." Aerith said.

            "It's been _nine_ years, Aerith! Forget about it! He'll never come around. He's no better than those damn Heartless we're fighting."

            The argument always went this way, and always ended with Aerith smashing Leon's foot with her heel.

            It was yet another day of this tiresome squabble. Yuffie was always amused by it. She and Leon and Aerith were sitting in the pub not ten steps away from Cid's accessory shop. Aerith quietly sipped her spiced tea as Leon mended his aching foot. Yuffie tried not to laugh lest she suffer Leon's wrath. It was no secret he found her incredibly annoying, which Yuffie found hilarious and exploited it for her entertainment. 

            "So what's behind that big curtain in the back of the pub?" Aerith asked as if they had just arrived. They had been there for a good half hour.

            "Oh!" Yuffie said, suddenly turning her body towards the back of the room. "They've been working on that for ages! It's a stage. It'll be ready by tomorrow! They decided to bring in some entertainment but they didn't have any place for them to perform."

            "What kind of entertainment?" Aerith asked, almost scared of what it might be.

            "Hey, this here's a decent place! They're bringing in some musicians."

            Aerith smiled in relief as Yuffie rolled her eyes. Leon grunted and released his foot, almost slamming it on the floor until he noticed Aerith's warning gaze upon him. He set it down slowly.

            "I just hope they don't get any crappy musicians up there…" he said rather bitterly. "A gig like that could ruin this place forever."

            "I'm sure they'll be extremely critical of who does and does not perform up there." Aerith said with a confident smile. "When's the first performance?"

            "Tomorrow night at around 9:00." Yuffie announced as if she were the secretary of events of the pub.

            "We should all come, then. I'll see if I can't talk Cid into it, too."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Dear Customers,

            I'm not in right now. I took a day off. You all drive me nuts sometimes. I'm sure whatever you need can wait until tomorrow. If it's that terribly important, though, you can reach me at my house in the second district alley. Look for cigarette smoke coming from under the door.

                                                                                                --Cid"

            Aerith rolled her eyes upon reading the note nailed to the door of the accessory shop. _Well…he does work hard. I guess he's earned a break, _she thought. Still, it would have been more convenient if he had waited until tomorrow to take a day off. _Maybe I can convince him to close up early tomorrow night._

As she made her way toward the second district, a moogle dashed in front of her, bouncing up and down in a rush of excitement. "Come see Lorelei in Jerico's Pub tomorrow at nine! Kupo!" The tiny creature showed her a flier. Aerith examined it and read "Indulge yourself in the euphoria of a soft and slow acoustic and the rich, sultry voice of Lorelei." A picture of the woman was also on the flier.

            Aerith laughed softly. "I wonder if she's as photogenic in person. Well, I'll definitely be there. Can I take a flier to show a friend?"

            "Absolutely! Kupo! Show everyone! Thanks!" And with the that, the moogle made a mad dash for the town square.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

            "Cid! It's me. Can I come in?" Aerith said with her usual soft and pleasant tone. She took a moment to listen for a response. There was a subtle thud, then a much louder clunk followed by the sound of slowly shuffling feet and drowsy grumbling.

            "Sorry. It's open." Cid's response came at last, his voice dull from behind the door.

            As Aerith stepped inside, she smiled at him, "What are you sorry for? It's your house. Sorry I woke you up."

            "It's okay. I sleep enough as it is, I guess. What's up?"

            Without a word, she held up the flier with a grin.

            "…um. Okay…and this is…?"

            "Jerico's Pub just finished installing a stage and tomorrow they're having their first performance. We should go."

            "I'm not really into music, Aerith…"

            "Then you should definitely go. You're missing out."

            "Not after taking a day off."

            "I'll pay you any lost income."

            "Hell no you won't!"

            "C'mon, it starts at nine. You'll only lose one hour of business…you probably won't even have much business! Everyone will be there."

            "Urrgh…" Cid scratched the back of neck. Aerith had a good reason for everything. "I suppose if I have nothing better to do…"

            "So you're coming?"

            "…shit, okay."

            "You'll love it, I promise."  
            "I'll hold you to that."

            Aerith laughed softly and gave Cid a friendly hug. He patted her shoulder and said "Okay, I guess I better make myself presentable in some form or fashion."

            "You really need a shave."

            "So says you. I need a cigarette."

            Aerith rolled her eyes and made her way for the door. "I'll see you tomorrow night."  
            "I'll meet you all there."

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

            The night of the performance came so fast Cid was sure he was being punished by some ethereal being. "Why did I do this to myself?" he said to himself while on his way to Jerico's Pub, the whole ten steps from his shop.

            "Cid, you ain't goin' to that show, are ya?" a rather pudgy townsman said as Cid just reached the threshold of the pub.

            "What's it to ya, fatass?"

            "Aww, that's so cute, Cid. You like chick music?"

            "_Chick music?!_ Shut the hell up! I'm doin' this for a friend!"

            "How thoughtful."

            "Go roll yourself in butter and feed yourself to a starving country you fat stupid piece of shit!"

            Unfortunately, Cid's wit came too slow, as the man was already down the steps, laughing his head off. Fuming, Cid stepped into the bar. The others were already there. As he examined the rest of the audience, he felt relieved to know that there were actually quite a few other men there. He took a seat between Aerith and Leon, thanking them for saving that specific seat for him. Sure Yuffie annoyed Leon, but it was nothing compared to the way she agonized Cid.

            "I thought you weren't going to show up. It's about to start." Aerith said in a whisper.

            "Why are you whispering?"

            "Because it's about to start!"

            "Oh…sorry. I got a little caught up in…something."  
            "It's okay. I'm glad you're here."

            "Yeah, no sweat."

            The lights suddenly dimmed and the crowd grew quiet. All eyes turned toward the stage. A short, petite woman with long red hair and eyes green as grass holding a beige acoustic guitar nimbly stepped to the center of the stage. She wore a long, dark red knitted duster and an earth-brown v-neck shirt underneath it. Hidden under her full-length pine-green skirt with elaborate red and yellow embroideries she wore thick brown hiking boots. Gold decorated her neck, wrists, and fingers. Around her eyes she wore a pair of black thick-rimmed glasses, rectangular in shape to match the sharp but subtle features of her face. The girl could be no younger than 25, no older than 30. She was absolutely gorgeous.

            The crowd applauded upon her arrival of the stage. Cid was confused. He thought people clapped at the end of the song and finally just went nuts at the end of the concert. He clapped lightly, still wondering what the point was.

            "Thank you," the woman said, her voice was soft and slightly accented. Cid almost caught himself wondering where she was from but scratched his temple hard before the thought even arrived. It didn't matter. Now she was in Traverse living as a performer. End of story. Even so, it gave him a brainitch. Why the hell would he think something like that? He was never interested in where someone was from. But now…he really felt that he wanted to know more about this woman.

            "My name is Lorelei." the woman said. She spoke in short, vague sentences, but her smile was pleasant and said more than a hundred words. She was truly happy to be on that stage. Her long, slender fingers strummed the guitar into glorious melody. There were no other instruments involved, only Lorelei and her acoustic guitar. Her lips moved like the wings of a bird, full and precise, her lyrics sung and articulated with perfection.

_Heroes can't save us,_

_Where we're headed._

_We prepare for the final flight,_

_But find ourselves en route again._

_There's no paradise,_

_There's no sanctuary,_

_There's no escaping._

_Doomed to a life of flight._

            There wasn't a chirp in the pub. Everybody listened…everybody knew of what she sung about. Cid felt like someone had cut into his chest and squeezed his heart. He _didn't _want to hear this, but he didn't want to leave.

_Damned are we who lose our hearts._

_The eternal struggle between grief and resentment._

Goddamn it, how did she know?

_We can't continue like this._

Who says you can't?

_It will destroy us._

Everything's been fine up 'til now.

_Let the wound bleed._

Damn…

_Let the wound bleed…_

…

            The first song ended slowly and softly. Suddenly Cid felt like he had been there for hours. His head ached and for some reason he had broken out into a cold sweat. In a panic he reached for a cigarette and lit it with a shaky hand.

            Leon noticed Cid's odd mannerisms. Aerith and Yuffie were too busy applauding. Cid met Leon's eyes and gave him cold stare. Leon smirked and looked away.

            As he puffed the cigarette, a second instinct came upon Cid. _Alcohol!_ He ordered the house beer. Finally he stopped shaking and his body temperature went back to normal. _That's what happens when you let things get to you, _he thought.

            The second song had already started. It was much easier for Cid's mind to digest.

_I'll be the one to tie the pieces together,_

_We'll never be too far apart._

A sappy love song was much more sufferable than a song about losing everything to the darkness the way everybody did. The first song dug into his memory and retrieved things he spent years burying. When the images flashed through his mind he wanted to shove a knife through his forehead.

_I'll be the one shielding you from the darkness,_

You gotta be kidding me…

_Fill our love up with light._

Protection. A duty most everybody in Traverse has taken up in their past. _I promise they won't get you! You just stay with me and you'll be fine! We'll be out of here before the worst can happen! I promise you!_

_If a cold wind blows,_

_I'll warm you in my heart_

Why won't you stop? _Those fucking monsters will have to go through hell before they hurt you. I promise I'll protect you_.

But he couldn't leave right in the middle of it. Everybody would know. They would all know what he was feeling...they would all see his weakness.  
The song ended. The crowd applauded. Cid wanted to die.  
"Thank you" Lorelei said with a smile.  
_Think you're so damn good..._  
"I know everybody here can relate to these words."  
_Think again. I'm not like that._  
"We're all the same..."  
_Nobody feels the way I do._  
"We all need each other. We all know what it's like."  
_ I don't want anybody else to feel the way I do..._  
The audience applauded again, almost as if to spite Cid. They all hated him. They wanted him to hurt. Some people cried.  
"We have to move on. Those we have lost don't want us to grieve forever. Let your grief rush like a river. Let the pain hurt. Just let it hurt."  
Aerith held Cid's hand. His fingers were cold as ice. She whispered his name but he didn't seem to hear her.  
"And after it hurts...we'll be ready."  
_How do you prepare for something like that?_  
"It's never too late to start."__


End file.
